Falling Star...

I felt shy, at brink of blushing out, I wanted to run away from the scene, hide somewhere and revise the admiring comment again and again; I was acting casual and mocking the compliment. Standing there I just started wondering this is so beautiful to be true. Can someone relate me to their heart and praise me to the extent I never thought for myself. I was anxious to know more, listen more. But it’s me running away from emotions, running away not to be with someone when they try to express what I am for them. It’s me keep running and running not to be felt neither somebody’s precious jewel to lock me in an iron case nor somebody’s woman to be felt possessive about. Let that emotion be unheard and never expressed, let they forget me for what I am and never relate me to their world. Let me be a fading memory of their happy casket.

How can i say?!

How foolish can you be! You went to the stars and said “I am here in search of my love, please show her to me, show me my love”. You asked the starts to show you your love who comforts you even at the last moment of your life holding you in her arms and loving you with an unknown promise. Stars said you know where she is.

With utter confusion and silence you went to the ocean asking him to show you your love expecting her resting in one of his pearl beds or playing with the mermaids and little fish. She might be admiring her long hair in front of the mirror dreaming how they look in your hands when you smell her. The deep said you always been with your love. You felt puzzled and ran away from there.

You went to the Sun, light of the world and asked him to show you your love. Asked him to search every corner, every shadow, and every place he rules upon. Asked him to show you the map or at least a hint of her existence. Sun smiled at you and said don’t wander in search of what you already have with you. You lost in his words and could not find yourself more mystified than ever.

You were tired and felt deprived by love. You were irritated and hated yourself upon your failure. You doubted your mere existence in the world of love. You cried resting on my shoulder not knowing how to find your love. You showed your innocent anger and lost in your unending tears.

I tried to sooth you but I was helpless all along your journey seeing you suffering and trying hard to get to your love. I was helpless and can only pity my mere existence to tell you something which you never felt but how can I tell you that you are always there with your love and how can I tell you she is standing beside you holding your hand in your journey for love.

Paint Yourself.....

He is here in the heart of my thoughts always chasing me to the darkest places, to the nadir of my existence. I ran in the fear of getting naked with my thoughts. I ran thinking of my escape, fighting for a breath of my own. I tried to ignore his mere existence only to find myself losing me more in him. I failed, I gave up, I’m so deep in the blood of my broken heart I wished to paint myself black to be his shadow, I wished to paint myself as a cool breeze singing my love to him. I wished to paint myself a corner of his heart to be in the rhythm of his heart beat. But I painted myself invisible to come out of his life just listening to him his newly found love.

Heart says...

What should I say, where should I start from? My heart said; go out feel the rhythm of the world. Go out learn the magic of living; go out and stretch your knowledge. I followed my heart and see I am here today at the place where I always dreamt about.

What should I say, where should I start from? My dream said you are there at the zenith of success, you are there as an example to novice of your world, you are there as a guide to the path never taken. I believed my dream and see where I am at the beginning of making my dream come true.

What should I say, where should I start from? I am free, I am independent and I am my limit. I see opportunity, I see life, I see success and I started seeing me the way I wanted to see me in my future.

What should I say, where should I start from? My heart wandered far away distances. It said search for your place, live your dream, fly high with your wide open wings, go high and high to the invisible heights. Now I see my present in the verge of my dream “but” only at the cost of realizing what I left behind me. Home where my heart always is.

Life goes on...

I took my art book and drew all my anger, showing all the irritation in it. People who see my drawing will definitely come to know that things are not all right with me. Of course they are not. Everybody will get irritated when you know that somebody is trying to bitch about you with no reason. I just wanted to show how wrong one was about me and prove myself. Hey hello! Knock knock! Proving? Is this necessary? Just imagine life can be so simple if we invest our mind and time in things which are really important to us. So, I decided not to be carried away with these silly emotions and forgive & forget things. After all Life goes on…

just an another day...

He started singing the song once written for his lost love, his broken heart. He took everyone around him into his past passing through his harmonious guitar strings. He wondered why she once the ruler of his heart left a deep scar of thought in it. Why still he has to spend his time in the hours of darkness thinking about her when she is not even giving an iota of thought to his pain. He sang his deepest feelings all along while people around listening to him pitied the girl for parting with such an admirer. He ended his poem in a sigh with a fading smile. Everyone applauded his talent with their silence while he started with his another song. This is just another day at our college lounge, passing time listening to beautiful minds.

Colors of Blind

I heard the voices. They are coming towards me. I went to them and said I’m a painter. They laughed at me, you a painter! said they. They left me all alone in my darkness.

I heard the voices. They are coming towards me. I went to them and showed what I had with me. It’s a painting, painting of an angle coming for me with the frills of the wind. She is beautiful like smell of a fresh rose. She is as soft as baby’s bottom. She is as pure as mother’s breast. She is all set to take me to her into the heaven of light. They saw the painting, laughed at me and left me all alone in my darkness.

I heard the voices. They are coming towards me. I went to them and explained what I had with me. It’s a painting of a toddler. It is playing in the mud. It is all covered with dirt and still shining with its innocence. It is riding on the excitement to discover the radiance of its tiny world. They heard me explaining my works, laughed at me and said u can never become a painter. They left me in my darkness all alone slaughtering my heart.

I heard the voices. They are coming towards me. I went to them and showed what I had with me with a belief that they will agree on my skills. It’s a painting again painting of garden. I painted flowers in it. I painted waters in it with strolling trees. I painted life singing to the tune of brightness. I used red, green, yellow and brown to make my garden look like the paradise of heavens. I stood in front of them with a hope that they will praise me for my gorges. I heard nothing, no voices, no sarcastic laughs; I wondered is every one appreciating my canvas in silence. I called for them but no answer. They already left the place. They never saw my paints. I felt no one could understand me. How could anyone? No one knows the colors of blind. They left me in my darkness all alone.

little write ups

These days I was taking all the pleasure feeling my heart smiling every time I think about you. But alas! I want to farewell to my pleasure, my happiness and to you, good bye my dear sweet memory, good bye my love.

In your presence I smell the fragrance of charm; in your presence I feel the magic of togetherness; in your presence I feel I am me and to my belief in , no wonder in your presence hell will crave to turn it self to a garden of heavens.

“Your mere presence will make a difference of universe to me”

“My heart goes on wandering in the darkest distances, in the hills and into the rivers going wild with unnoticed convolutions. I say to god oh! Stop mocking me again and again I will get my love to tease your craziness. Come dear you are the one to give me my peace. Hold my hand and take me with you to the music of love.”

“I can see you there, there standing in a corner of my heart smiling and giggling to my foolish endeavors; I mean no shame but realize your presence with me all the time and feel the joy and strength to win the world and land it at your feet.”

World, never been stunning to me than it is today, never the skies sung for me as they are singing today, never the trees revealed the secrets of lovers as they were today. i think i know why everything is looking beautiful to me today. I think I know why.

Little time left to think of me in a day…… (Thought fm my frnd)
7. Let gusting winds take your thoughts for you, let the seasons first blossoms nourish your thoughts for you, let the potter’s wheel give a pure form, with a touch of wet scent of the earth to them, let the birds carry them in a soft pollen bed and let the cool breeze whistle them to u as a sweet thought of yours. How simple things can be when someone else think about you for you.

As now I’m the power of two to face the sorrow….. (Thought fm my frnd)
8. I’m alone in the mother’s womb; I’m alone a dead man in the tomb; I’m alone in the story of me and I’m alone in the theatre of living. I’m alone to face heat of the sun and alone to love the beauty of the moon; I’m all alone, I’m all alone; I’m always alone thinking how important to have the one beside you to tell, “you alone is true to my heart in the deepest thought”.

9. “It is just that grey dust and not life; It is just a war but not the story of brave souls in the grave; It is just a mix of mad colors but not a canvas of thought, it is just those tuned compositions but not one’s cry for love and it is just a word but not the tender expression when one cannot relate u me and us.”

The World is living in its peace

I am a small baby dependent and happy. No wonder everything around me is a wonder to me. I felt this is my life pleasant and soft like a full moon and always shine like a bright star forgetting the darkness of the night. The world is living in its peace.

Playing and shouting, running and singing suddenly I found myself all alone on a brink. With all the confusion in my mind I ran, I ran until I found nothing, nothing except loneliness. Fallen leaves were taken away by the wind, and they are not alone. The sky dropped its veil on its face with faint and sad clouds, but it is not alone and the world is living in its peace.

I prayed the day, I prayed the night and I felt lack of expression in my heart. I’m drowning in the storm of sadness. I could hear no sound of help. Who said world is not living in its peace? World is living in its peace.

No voice to hear no one to hear me cry. Every thing is in its stand still and everything is in its rush. I’m mystified. I could see way to darkness and rays of despair. I could see death of my heart but could listen to its discordant beats. I cried and cried with no tears left. I screamed to the height of my voice that only I could listen. I thought I became dumb or everyone around me was deaf, but world is living in its peace.

Days passed away, years traveled away with the speed of light, but I could go nowhere leaving my solitude all alone. Suddenly I saw someone with my name stretching her hand of assurance and hope to take me to the zenith of happiness. I followed her with fear and hope I followed her with doubt and belief and I followed her with ecstasy and love. At last I saw people laughing I saw them singing, saw them running here and there with joy, I saw them busy in their own works. I wondered where was every one when I’m in need. World is living in its peace